Because the love for our pets never dies
Celebrate Your Pet with My Pet’s Ashes
Hi I’m Kaz the founder of My Pet’s Ashes. I set up this resource after losing my cat April. I couldn’t find the right questions to ask my vet or the right support online to help me with my loss. I want you to have a much better experience if you lose a family member, your pet. I have scoured the research to find good practical advice to help you during your pet bereavement journey. I have found the most beautiful and unique ways to celebrate your bond with them. They may no longer be here but your unique connection with them can last forever,
Our pets are what makes getting up every morning so joyful. If we no longer have that daily fix of love it can be tough. Let's honour all the love they gave. I can help guide you gently through your journey. Let me help you cherish that special relationship. I'm here, I understand, they weren't 'just a pet' I get it.
When a valued member of your family dies, your dog, your cat, your rabbit, or any loved pet, it can have a devastating effect on you and the rest of your family. The feelings of grief and sadness during a pet bereavement can sometimes feel overwhelming. We have put together a guide which we hope will be helpful during this sad time, you can sign up here.
Grief is a powerful process and coming to terms with the death of a beloved pet can be extremely difficult, and everyone will experience the loss differently.
Your pet bereavement journey
It is important to remember that your pet bereavement journey is unique, and that there is no ‘normal’ way of doing it. There is no standard length of time that it will take until the feelings start to subside. For some it may be weeks or months, for others it may take years.
It is important to give yourself time to grieve and allow your pet bereavement journey to take place gradually at your own pace. Try not to ‘bottle up’ your emotions, if you really feel that you can’t talk to someone about the loss of your pet then perhaps you could write it all down in a journal.
It is important not to ignore these feelings, you are not weak and there is no need to be ashamed, you have lost a member of your family and you will need to grieve.
Advice about your pet’s ashes
Advice about pet ashes is something that your vet or your pet crematorium doesn’t always talk about. Your pet is part of your family and when you have to say goodbye it can be difficult to know what to do or who to turn to. There is no funeral so you can be left just holding an urn or scatter tube.
I’ve had to say goodbye to Tommy, Siouxsie and April and it was tough, every time. Since 2010 I’ve been helping people to cope with pet grief and giving them the right information so that they can choose what is right for them, their pet and their families.
I get it. I understand how special that bond is. Let me help you to celebrate their life and give you that connection you can keep forever.
Some people understand pet bereavement and some don’t.
Not everyone will understand your loss, people can have some very strange ways of dealing with death, some people will simply not like to talk about death, others may feel that a loss of a pet is somehow less important than losing a person, especially if they have never had a pet of their own.
You may need to find people outside of your usual circle to talk to who do understand the love and companionship that having a pet brings, those who realise the enormity of your loss and can help you to talk about your grief.
If you can’t find people to talk to you might want to consider getting professional bereavement counselling, a trained counsellor can help you through your bereavement journey and will be able to refer you to a medical professional if you need help for depression.
Tips for dealing with pet grief and sorrow
Sorrow and grief are completely normal responses to a death of a pet but they can be very painful. As well as talking to others and or professionals there are things you can do which might help make your bereavement journey a little easier to cope with:
Have a funeral or rainbow bridge ceremony– funerals or scattering ceremonies allow us to openly express our grief, they may not automatically happen for pets but that doesn’t mean you shouldn’t have one or need one. Take the time to write some words to say, or a poem to read and invite your friends or family or others who understand the importance of what your pet meant to you, and spend some time thinking and feeling about that special pet.
You may want to plant a tree or create a special photo album or scrapbook with your memories so that you can remember all the fun times you had together. There are lots of really lovely ways that you can memorialise the loss of your pet with your pets ashes.
Looking after yourself during pet bereavement
Remember to look after yourself, bereavement can really take it’s toll on both your energy and your emotions. It’s important to make sure you are eating sensibly and exercising regularly. It’s important if you have other pets to maintain their daily exercise routines, this will also help with your sleep which can sometimes be affected by grief.
And as Telegraph columnist Ben Fogle puts it “grief is the price we pay for love“.
Celebrating the life of your pet
We’ve been helping people to find a way to celebrate their pet’s life by doing something meaningful with their ashes. You may choose to bury their ashes in your garden or scatter them and that is good, we have ceremony sets to help you do that. But can also choose to do lots of other things that will be as unique your your bond with them. Silver or Gold memorial jewellery, memorial glass, handmade ceramic urns, marine-grade stainless steel garden ornaments.
The most important thing is to take your time. Ask the right questions and create a special memory that you can treasure forever